When I was young I knew everything...

ARGH! If I'm so smart then why haven't I figured it out? You know, everything... everything I ever wanted to know... I'm filled with questions to which I cannot conceive of answers.. and as badly as I want the answers I am scared that I won't understand...
They tell me test put me in the "genius range with a 93.2% chance of scoring better with successive tests" well I DON'T FEEL LIKE A FUCKING GENIUS. I fell like a frustrated little kid that can remember being laughed at when they were 12... why did Dad laugh at me? Because I was angry then.. I was angry that I had spent MONTHS thinking through my existence and had not come to a solid conclusion. Well it's been over FOUR YEARS and I still don't know. I'm just some, pathetic little animal trying to struggle with "the nature of it's life" like a mouse trying to contemplate and conceptualise the enormity of the grand canyon (I doubt the mouse would be able to come up with bad metaphors, though - *sarcasm*wow, go me I can out think a damn mouse*end sarcasm* I don't like sarcasm... it makes me feel snarky - wrong).

*40 seconds and a complete change in perspective later*
I danced.... standing on the ground... moving through the air... I waved my arms around and enjoyed the feeling of the air... and that's all I need. Ever. The simple things, they're what ground me. They're the answer. They make everything worth it. The simple things that combine together to make that which is complex (there is more to that thought but I fear I am not as literary as I should need to be to make it as elegant as it deserves).... They're perfect, and breathtaking and beautiful.
It's ok now. Everything is ok.